Zentropik Research Blog

Emailing Cute Women

Posted in Emails, Pictures, Profiles, Science by Dan

Found a interesting blog post which argues for the following – somewhat counter-intuitive — claims about ‘cute’ women online:

The more men disagree about a woman’s looks, the more likely they are to end up messaging her.
Men tend to ignore a large class of ‘traditionally cute’ women.
Having some men think she’s ugly actually works in a woman’s favor.

For example:

This girl is rated by almost everyone to be very cute. Yet, she receives fewer messages than the ‘site average.’

We end up with the following paradox:

This finding is based on data collected from a database of OkCupid users. Click here to read the whole thing.

For those in a hurry, here’s what you need to know:

1. The author’s main conclusion: If a guy thinks a girl is cute, and he suspects that most guys would agree, then he’s likely to conclude that there’ll be a LOT of competition over her… which, in turn, gives him less incentive to message her (unless she’s ‘super hot’, in which case he’s more likely to say ‘what the hell’ and just go for it).

2. So, if you’re a single guy, here’s what this means for you:

If you find a girl’s photos attractive, and suspect that most other men would find her attractive too, then that may actually be a good reason to message her…

If she’s ‘traditionally cute’, then a lot of guys may pass on her, simply because they’re likely to think that there’ll be too much competition for her. But, in reality, it’s probably the exact opposite, that is, most guys won’t email her (precisely because they all had the same initial impulse you did!).

In other words, resist your initial impulse here and do the opposite of what every other guy is going to do. Email the girls you find cute, especially if you think other guys would find them cute too.

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The ‘Nice Guy’ Effect

Posted in Profiles, Science by Dan

A recent study looked at how signs of kindness, altruisum and generosity affect a man’s attractiveness online. For those in a hurry, here’s a quick summary of the study and what they found:

Women test subjects were shown a series of dating profiles. In some of the profiles, the researchers added hints of altruism, kindness or generosity. Women showed a strong preference for the dating profiles with hints of these ‘nice guy’ traits. Moreover, this applied to women regardless of whether they were seeking a long term relationship or something more casual.

So then how you can you take advantage of this ‘nice guy’ effect?

The key is to be subtle about it. Instead of simply bragging about how kind or altruistic you are, include a few choice details on the way to making an entirely different point. For example, you could say:

“My time is at a premium. In addition to holding down a full-time job, I also sit on the board of a local charity for underprivileged kids, and try to get the never-ending list of projects done on my house. But I’m looking forward to making time to spend with the right person.”

Notice that while this passage includes details that imply ‘nice guy’ traits, it is not simply about being a ‘nice guy.’ Rather, it’s about balancing a busy schedule and making time for a relationship.

Or you could briefly–emphasis on the word “briefly”–mention the mission trip you went on (or the youth softball team you helped coach, or the time you volunteered at a soup kitchen) and how this experience changed your perspective on life.

You get the idea.

10 Profile Pics You Should Never Upload

Posted in Pictures by Dan

Whether you’re on Facebook or eHarmony (or, God help you, MySpace), profile pictures are really important. Here’s a helpful list of 10 types of profile pics to avoid: Read More

I recommend checking out the article. For those in a hurry, here’s a quick summary:

Don’t post pictures without a clear objective of the message you want your profile to send, and of how your photos fit with that message. Too often, guys are blind to the various messages that a photo is sending. Handle this like a marketing firm and convey a clear, deliberate message.

P.S. And if you don’t have a lot of photos to begin with, start taking more . Or if you’re really serious about getting some quality photos fast, I recommend using this service (I’ve used it myself, and it made an immediate impact on the responses I was getting).

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From 0 to 70 in less than a week (audio)

Posted in Audio, Interviews, Stories by Dan

My friend, Vinny, has been tearing it up online!

Within a week of posting his dating profile, he was already getting a 70% response rate, and had been on 3 dates, with several more women wanting to meet up with him that week. And that was before all the real craziness started…

Anyway, I recently got him to ‘spill the beans’ on EXACTLY what he’s doing:

what he puts in the subject lines of his emails
what he puts in the body of his emails
what he says on the phone
all the @%# crazy stuff that’s been happening on his dates

WARNING#1: He recently got out of a relationship and has decided to date more than one woman at once, as he wants to get to know these women better before making an exclusive commitment to any one of them (the horror!). However, he doesn’t use trickery or deception to get women to like, date, or pursue him.

WARNING#2: The recording picked up some background distortion that couldn’t be filtered out.

With that said, this is an awesome interview, with over 40 min. of great content.

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

(or if your browser doesn’t support the above media console, just click here)

Enjoy!

The 4 Big Myths of Profile Pictures?

Posted in Pictures, Profiles, Science by Dan

A blogger working for Ok Cupid has been posting some very interesting online dating articles. In the most recent one, he claims – contrary to conventional wisdom — that: